Kenya Has Fallen

It’s amazing how I have not blogged in over a month, and the first thing I decide to blog about is the foolishness that I watched on tv last night. But I have a very strong opinion about the fight between Porsha and Kenya, and what I have to say warrants more than a Facebook status update.

When I was thinking about writing this post last night, the original title was going to be “Miss USA Has Fallen”, but I thought it would be a little disrespectful to the current title holder, so I had to regroup.

Since hearing about the infamous fight that took place between Porsha and Kenya and seeing a portion of it last week, I was really interested in seeing what happened.

First, let’s be upfront. Kenya has been antagonizing Porsha since last season. She found various ways to dig at her and antagonize her. Even when asking valid questions about Porsha and her relationship with Kordell, which (honestly) is none of her business, Kenya always had a catty tone in her voice and really has no concern for Porsha one way or the other. As I was trying to explain the events prior to last night’s reunion to Southern Mom, you really have to have seen their relationship over the past two years to fully grasp the built up animosity between these two women.

When I heard that Kenya Moore was joining the cast of the “Real Housewives of Atlanta” I was SO excited! I think every little black girl that grew up in the 1990s was familiar with Kenya and who she was and what she represented as being a former Miss USA. She was beautiful, she was poised, and she was able to keep herself relevant over the last 20 years. But once she joined the cast, I was thoroughly disappointed with her behavior. To put it simply, she was rude, condescending, and inappropriate.

So as not to rehash the past two seasons of RHOA, let’s talk about last night. Kenya was inappropriate. The nerve of her to not only pull out a scepter, but she had the audacity to wave it in people’s faces. THEN, she pulls out a bullhorn and proceeds to yell in the ears of others; I was watching on tv and wanted to tell her to kill that noise. (Kudos to Cynthia for not reacting to Kenya being in her personal space and yelling in her ear.) I do not condone violence…but Kenya had it coming. The bully never likes it when their victim has turned the tables. And while Kenya made a statement regarding the event that took place earlier this month, now is not the time for her to act like she is Miss Innocent.  Part of her statement (“…there are little girls who look up to me. I would never want those girls, my nieces, or my future children to see me fighting anyone.”) makes me wonder if she cares about them seeing her belittle someone, scream at someone, and really just behave in a manner that is unlike a pageant winner.  It also makes me wonder about the people in her circle, particularly her pageant coach and anyone else that she have known in the pageant world, told her that her behavior was unbecoming of a queen.  Yes, Kenya is 40+, but we all have a circle of elders we go to, regardless of our age.

At the end of the day, Porsha was wrong for becoming physical with Kenya.  She should feel somewhat embarrassed (I know I would).  But does she owe Kenya an apology?  I say “No”…not unless Kenya returns one of her own.

Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city.

Candice is Better Than Me

The season finale of “Big Brother” was last night.  I was not a fan of any of the three finalists.  But I felt that Andy was probably the best person to win out of who was left. And I’m glad he did win.  When you think about the game of “Big Brother” and how Andy played it, he kinda did deserve to win, especially over GinaMarie.

While Julie Chen was interviewing the jury, Candice made mention that she and Aaryn have become friends.  Amanda is still hateful and probably will never change.  But after the hateful and hurtful things Aaryn said, Candice found it in her heart to try to work on a relationship with her.  Probably because Aaryn may have realized that she did and said some wrong things and was willing to work on them…or at the very least seem remorseful.

When Julie addressed the five evicted houseguests that had been watching the whole season, I LOVED Howard’s response when Julie asked him how he felt watching at home.  His response showed why I totally have a crush on him.  And why he was one of America’s Top 3 Favorite players this season.  Spencer looked like a deer in headlights when Julie asked him to respond to Howard-basically another person who made disparaging and discriminatory comments but wasn’t ready to address them head on.

I wonder what the houseguests (read Aaryn, GinaMarie, Spencer, and yes, even Amanda) thought when they went home or talked to family and found out exactly what America has been saying about them over the last 90 days.

I guess if Candice can find it in her heart to befriend someone that made SO many rude, disrespectful, and unnecessary remarks about her I guess I can learn not to hold any animosity towards her.  But I’m only human and God is not through with me yet.  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!

PS  Can I tell you guys that Howard was in my dreams last night???  Yeah, I need to travel to Alabama so I can meet him in person…

Don’t Question Me

We all have guilty pleasures.  Some of us like to gamble.  Some of us like to club.  Some of us like to read steamy novels. Some of us play video games.  Some of us even like to go to seedy clubs.  No one really questions these people.  We let them go on their merry little way and enjoy their vices, as long as they are not hurting anyone.  So why is it women, especially black women, get so much flack for watching reality television?  I admit when I was younger, I watched “Keeping Up With the Kardashians”, “Bad Girls Club”, just about all of the Housewives series on Bravo, and any “love” show VH1 had on like it was going out of style.  As I’ve gotten older, some shows have fallen by the wayside, but others I still watch.  Some people seem to think that’s a problem.

I have seen numerous stories and Facebook posts shunning women, making women feel ashamed, and questioning anyone that watches these types of shows.  So, if anyone questions you about what you do in your spare time, here a few anecdotes you can share. (Honestly, I wish I had 5 so I could do a countdown like Olivia did to Edison…) First and foremost, it’s my money and my time.  And if I want to spend my money and my time watching this, that’s what I’m going to do.  Second, I don’t do drama in real life.  So I get my fix from watching crazy people on tv.  Lastly, it’s a sign of the times.  Unfortunately, reality television has taken over our tv channels.  And let’s just be honest; some of these shows are pretty entertaining.

Now, no one has questioned me directly about what I watch on television (except maybe Southern Mom when she’s visiting and I’m watching “Big Brother”), but I felt the need to respond to all these naysayers.  My opinion is that as long as I’m not allowing what I see to negatively influence my life, I’m good.  Unfortunately, not everyone can say the same.  And that’s ok-it’s important we know our strengths.  If you’re the responsible, make sure to reiterate to the person in your life that these are not every day people and 95% of this stuff will not work and would not happen in the real world.

Another great thing is that we have great reality tv to counteract the ridiculous drama.  I love watching my favorite twins “Tia and Tamera”. And I thoroughly enjoyed watching Kimora Lee Simmons latest foray in television on “Life in the Fab Lane”.

So, if your girlfriend/wife/mother/friend/whatever wants to watch the “Real Housewives of Miami” or “Love and Hip-Hop” or “Bad Girls Club”, don’t question her.  Let her enjoy her guilty pleasure.  Be glad she’s not getting drunk every night.  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!

Is The Ring Enough?

Today, we have a guest post from one of my oldest friends from Florida, Cristin Jordan.  She’s a reality tv buff, like me.  We message each other ALL the time on Facebook about various shows to share our thoughts on these crazy people we watch on television.  And it seems as if she has a little inside scoop and some thoughts about “Love and Hip-Hop” veterans Chrissy and Jim Jones. 

From what I could sniff out on various social media channels, it looks pretty good that the reality show “Chrissy and Mr. Jones” is coming back for another season. Being an old married chick myself, I love watching the dynamics of other people’s relationships play out.

For most of us ladies, it’s all about getting the ring, right? And when it comes to Chrissy, my gosh what a ring it was! Did you see it? I’m tempted to say it’s hard to describe it with just mere words. I doubt the Queen of England has anything that nice. I don’t believe you should ever stare, but the ring is worth a second, heck even a third look if you happen to pass Chrissy at the grocery store.  My inside scoop tells me that the ring is from Avianne & Co., a popular New York City jeweler that works with many celebrities, including Lil’ Wayne and Ciara. (If you haven’t checked out their jewelry before it is a must-see as their pieces are exquisite.) 

Chrissy must be a rabbit because her ring has carats for days! It’s nearly 10 carats set in 18K white solid gold. The center diamond was specially cut and imported from Israel. It took almost two weeks to make.

 So she did it. She got the ring, and it looks like she got the man.

I really wish them the best. I’m a big proponent of marriage. It’s not easy, and I hope the two of them can make it work, especially when the cameras stop rolling.

That exquisite piece of jewelry on her left hand isn’t attainable for most of us. At $140,000, it cost more than the average home in a lot of cities. But I do believe a good solid relationship is within everyone’s reach.

For starters keep the communication going and don’t ever take anything for granted, especially each other.
 
So Chrissy, I lift my glass and say cheers. Here’s to a life as magnificent and blinged out as those perfectly cut diamonds on your left hand.

Cristin Jordan is a freelance writer from Jacksonville, FL.  A mom, she loves rachett, or shall we say reality, tv even though even she will admit the drama goes too far. Cristin loves to travel, and when her bags aren’t packed, she’s trying to figure out how she’s going to take her next trip.

I Watch Too Much Drama

Some of my favorite scripted shows currently on television are “Scandal”, “The Walking Dead”, “Law and Order:SVU”, and “Deception”.  Some of my favorite reality shows are “Braxton Family Values”, “Mary Mary”, and “Real Housewives of…” Atlanta AND Beverly Hills.  See a pattern???  I do.  All of these shows are an hour long and can be considered dramas.  While I may be entertained when I watch these shows, I don’t laugh.  Well, the Braxton sisters may get a chuckle out of me every now and then, but for the most part everything is drama, drama, and more drama!  I need to smile and laugh and have fun when I watch a show.

Enter “Real Husbands of Hollywood”.  Honestly, I’m not sure what made we start watching this show.  Well, it could be Boris Kodjoe…  Since BET is trying to switch up its programming, I decided to see what this show along with “Second Generation Wayans” was all about.  RHOH got me the first time I watched it.  In a nutshell, Kevin Hart is hilariously funny.  He is 90% of the reason I watch it each week.  I have never (NEVER) laughed so hard watching a television show.  Honestly, I think it’s the best comedy on right now.

I’ve tried to watch other 30 minute comedies on other channels, and it has not worked out well.  I’m bored, and what I’m seeing is not funny.  Not even a little bit.  “The Game” is coming back on Tuesday, but even that isn’t as funny as it used to be.  And now that the RHOH had its season finale, what am I supposed to watch to make me laugh and bring a little funny to my day?  I’m open to suggestions.  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!

Fall Back, NeNe

Last night, I was watching the “Real Housewives of Atlanta”, which is one of my guilty pleasures.  Every Sunday night, if I’m home, I can be found chilling on my couch tuned to Bravo.  I even popped some popcorn to watch the drama unfold last night.  Suprisingly, I have been Team NeNe this season.  Last week, I felt her ire as the ladies showed up almost 3 hours late to a dinner that NeNe had hosted in their honor.  And I’m glad she stook by her guns and didn’t let them in her house (although I think I would have been pissed had I been on the other side).  Unfortunately, I had to give my girl Ms. Leakes the side-eye last night.

It’s no secret to anyone that watches RHOA that Porsche Stewart is the quintessential housewife-she doesn’t have a real “job” but volunteers at a foundation named after her grandfather, she cooks and cleans for her husband, and she doesn’t do anything without running it past her mate.  This type of marriage seems to be working for the Stewarts.  But NeNe, in all of her infinite wisdom, has decided that Porsche needs to develop her OWN identity separate from her husband and do what she wants to do.  So the ladies decide to teach Porsche some life lessons during their first night in Vegas.

While I guess I understand where NeNe is coming from, I feel that she is way out of line.  It has only taken me 30 years to realize that I do not need to be in every body’s relationship.  If it works for those two who are in it, who am I to criticize/chastise/judge?  Porsche made a conscience decision to enter into the “type” of marriage she has with Cordell.  She has stated numerous times on the show that Cordell is old fashioned and that is what she likes about him.  And as someone that has stated multiple times that I would LOVE being a housewife (not sure how long that would last, though), I totally get where Porsche is coming from.  She wants her husband to be the head of the household, to be the caregiver and provider, and to be the decision maker.  In essence, she enjoys being submissive to her husband.  As someone that has friends that have dated men 10+ years older, one of the drawbacks/compromises/things is that he’s more likely to “tell” you want to do and be set in his ways and want you to behave a certain way.

Now, what I do not like and cannot appreciate is the disrespectful way that Cordell addresses Porsche at times.  But, once again, if she does not have a problem with it, who are we to comment?  Has Porsche ever turned to NeNe as a confidant and stated she doesn’t like the way her husband talks to her sometimes?  Has Porsche ever confided in NeNe that she wishes Cordell would give her a little breathing room?  No, she hasn’t, at least not from what I have seen.  Another point I can’t get with is when Porsche stated Cordell “let” her go on the trip.  I don’t understand how or why one grown person has to get permission from their partner to do something.  (Maybe it was just a matter of word choice.)  When I was in high school, I totally didn’t get why my best friend’s dad wouldn’t “let” her mom cut her hair.  But when you marry, it’s about compromise.  Sometimes you do things you may not like in order to keep your mate happy.  It should not, though, be a one-way street.

The moral of today’s post?  If your friend/homegirl/acquaintance is happy in her relationship, leave her alone.  What will not and should not be tolerated is her man being disrespectful to you.  You can definitely put him in his place about that.  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!

The Realness of Tia and Tamera

In a world where reality television is king and black women arguing and fighting each other doesn’t cause anyone to bat an eye, it was SO refreshing see twins Tia Mowry-Hardrict and Tamera Mowry-Housley with their own reality show on the Style Network.  “Tia and Tamera” was my Monday night guilty pleasure.  We’ve always loved these twins since “Sister, Sister” and have watched them grow up, from Tia’s currently starring role on “The Game” and Tamera’s run on Lifetime Network’s “Strong Medicine”. 

Not only did these sisters have each other to lean on, but they also had friends and their mates.  I SO fell in love with Cory Hardrict (Tia’s husband) after last night’s episode.  He was so supportive during Tia’s pregnancy and was definitely the calm one.  He also was so excited to see his son and encouraged his wife every step of the way.  When Tamera and her husband, Adam, were faced with racism from “fans”, Adam told Tamera, “That’s their issue; not ours”, it showed that he loved her no matter what. 

Now, just like all sisters, Tia and Tamera did have their disagreements.  Especially when it came to Tamera’s wedding.  I totally felt that Tia was being selfish.  And I’ve never been pregnant, but I felt like that was Tia’s excuse for EVERYTHING!!!  And I thought she was wrong when she didn’t want Andrea, Tamera’s friend, to be the Maid of Honor.  But all things worked out in the end, and that is what’s important.

I’ve always enjoyed the Mowry sisters and was excited to see them get their own show.  And I’ve even more excited that “Tia and Tamera” was picked up for a second season.  Hopefully, we won’t have to wait that long!  To Tia and Tamera, on behalf of Black women in this country who truly value what’s important, family, friends, and sisterhood, thank you for showing the world that not all of us are celebrity hungry, coattail-riding, angry, bitter women.  Until next time, I’m just as Southern girl…in the city!