I’m Over Being a Party of One

Last weekend I had my housewarming.  It was great having my friends over to celebrate my home.  I trust everyone had a great time.  Well, everyone DID have a great time, seeing as how much food was eaten and how many empty champagne bottles I put in the recycling bin.  But some things were missing.  I definitely wished the parentals had been here (Southern Dad will be in DC before the end of the year…he says).  But I wish I had a mate here.  A boo.  A steady love interest who could have stood by my side and wished me well on this new endeavor in my life.  Basically, I’m tired of being single.

I’m tired of wanting to go somewhere and trying to figure out a) which of my friends are single and want to go or b) which of my married/boo’ed up friends would go with me.  I want to be able to say, “Babe, let’s go to ______” and we go.  Alas, it’s been a LONG minute since that’s happened. For example, I want to go to the Redskins pre-season game when they play the Jaguars.  So my linesister is going with me.  I want to see Stevie Wonder in October at the Verizon Center.  Do I a) buy two tickets and hope I have a boo by then or b) (once again), ask a single friend to go with me?

Don’t get me wrong – I enjoy my single life.  But it’s old.  Like really, really old.  I desire a friend, a lover, a prayer partner, a church attendee mate, and a gentleman all rolled into one.  Who belongs to me. And I belong to him.  Do you hear me, Lord???

Le sigh.  In any event, that’s where I am.  Being single’s not overrated, but it is played out.  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city.

The Beginning of Something New

At the end of 2014, I met a guy.  We spoke, we laughed, we joked, but we didn’t take things seriously, and eventually, we stopped communicating.  Or maybe I didn’t take things seriously.  He was significantly younger than me, plus he lived 6 hours away.  Not to mention I wasn’t really focused on dating since I had way too much going on in other aspects of my life.  Fast forward 5 months, and we start talking again.  During the month of July we hangout for an extended amount of time.  What I thought might be awkward wasn’t.  It may have been the most comfortable I’ve felt with a man ever.  It was at that time, homeboy realized he was serious about me.  Like REALLY serious.  And as TyAnthony likes to accuse me of, I enjoyed the attention, I’ll admit.  And I have been known to date men because of how much they are in to me and not necessarily because I’m into them.  So, I had to think and reflect – did I like this guy?  If I did like him, was it genuine?  Or, once again, did I like him based on how much he liked me?  And, did I even want to like him?

I have been known to keep a wall up.  I thought this was something only I knew, but TyAnthony and Antonio  called me out on it. So, after awhile, I decided if homeboy was going to be serious, I was going to be serious, too. Let my guard down, be open and honest, and lay my cards on the table.  So I am slowly giving him all of me.

So far so good, although two potential things (well really one) almost put a halt on things.  Well, maybe they were more to serve as a distraction.  First, a few weeks ago, I met a man while I was out with my linesisters.  We struck up a conversation, exchanged numbers, and made plans to hang out.  We danced, and his parting words were, “I’m not looking to be your friend. I’m looking for my life partner.”  Well, seemed like I was batting 1000 because you all know I like to keep my options open.  Sad to say, after one outing, ol’ boy disappeared.  Honestly, it was probably for the best as he has one non-negotiable that is at the top of my list.  The second distraction was an old beau that called out of the random blue.  (I probably should change my phone number.)

In any event, I decided to be open.  I had to tell myself, “Elle, if this man is really into you, he’s telling you the right things, more importantly DOING the right things, give him a chance and be open.”  So, that’s what we’re doing.  Yes, I told him about this blog, but I doubt that he has read it yet.  (Just my luck he’ll read this post.)  Anyway, wish me luck.  I am excited to see what happens.  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!