I Finally Had My Olivia Pope Moment

It’s a few hours after Fitz is shot.  Olivia returns to the White House to “handle it”.  After she talks Mellie into addressing the public, she goes to the closet of the First Couple to get a suit for her.  Once she enters, she’s sidetracked when she sees Fitz’s clothing-his suits, his jeans, his sweatshirts.  She grabs a sweatshirt, sits down, and inhales his scent.  Then…she cries.  Not too hard and not too long.  But she cries.  Then all of a sudden, she stops.  She gets up, replaces the sweatshirt, grabs Mellie’s suit, straightens her jacket, wipes her eyes, and leaves.

I cried yesterday.  Not hard.  Not long.  But I cried.  And then I wiped my eyes, washed my face, and kept it moving.

It’s hard being a woman.  Sure we look pretty, are friendly, and have things together, but it’s hard.  We have to deal with crazy things at work, possibly at home, and with our family.  It’s not easy keeping things together.  Or appearing to keep things together.  You may see us in our suit or our heels with a smile on our face, but you have no clue what’s occurring beneath the surface.

Now don’t misunderstand, it’s not a complaint or a feeling of being ungrateful.  But it’s not always easy when the life you currently have is not the life you envisioned for yourself.  Or when people don’t do right, you have to be the fixer.  Or if things start to fall apart and go awry, you have to put them together again.

It would be great if you had that support system that you could go to when things got rough or a little complicated.  And sometimes you do.  But you don’t want to be a burden or you don’t want them to worry. It would be better if things never got rough or complicated.  But that’s not realistic.  Life is experiencing the good with the bad and the easy with the difficult.  Sometimes you wonder how long this not so great season will last.

It’s hard being a woman.  It’s even harder being Superwoman.  To have the appearance that nothing phases you, that all your ducks are in a row, that you have everything together is not easy.  But some days you need to cry.  You could be sad or angry or frustrated and you don’t know what to do.  So you cry.  Not hard and not long.  Just enough to get the frustration out. Then you get up, wipe your eyes, put on your big girl panties, and keep it moving.  I’m sure Superwoman cried sometimes, too.

Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city.

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