I just randomly came across this older post. While I am happy to say I have put some of these tidbits into practice, I could do more. In the hustle and bustle of life, it’s SO easy to neglect ourselves. So make it one of your goals in 2013 to take some time for you. 🙂

Southern Girl in the City

Yes, I realize it’s been almost a week since I’ve written anything.  Honestly, I was tired and really didn’t have too much to share with you guys.  This weekend I attended “Refresh 2011”, which is a conference geared towards the African woman (yes, I know I’m not African), but all women could gain something from attending this event.  I realized (not that I didn’t already know this) that you have to be able to take care of yourself before you can take care of others.  There were a lot of anecdotes I took from this event, and I want to share some of them with you.

  • Be sure to take time for you.  If you don’t take care of yourself how can you take care of the important people in your life?
  • From the organizer, Ekene Ajune, she reminded us that the Bible says “Love your neighbor as thyself”, but…

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Question This

At the end of 2012, Black people were all up in arms about Zoe Saldana playing Nina Simone in her biopic.  (Read this, and this, and this.)  I think I even broached this topic with a few people on Facebook.  While researching a few things this week, I became aware of a few other things that have occurred in Hollywood, and I was wondering why people didn’t question them-at least to the extent that was done with Zoe.

I was trying to decide if I wanted to purchase the movie, “W”, Oliver Stone’s flick about (his perception of) President George W. Bush.  I was also interested in the movie because a childhood friend that was murdered the same year the movie was released has a small role in it.  When I looked at the cast, I was stunned and surprised to see that Thandie Newton was playing Condoleezza Rice.  I was even MORE stunned when I saw stills from the film that showed Thandie “dressed” as Condi, complete with wig AND make-up to make her appear more like the US National Security Adviser.  (For the record, she played Rice before she was appointed to Secretary of State). In my opinion, I think this is the same situation regarding Zoe and Nina…yet I don’t recall anyone making a big deal about this.  Why is that?  While Thandie is an amazing actress, I don’t see her playing Condoleezza.  There’s nothing about these two ladies that remind me of the other.  And let’s not talk about Jeffrey Wright playing Secretary of State Colin Powell.  Maybe a big stink wasn’t made because the film wasn’t about Rice; it was about the President.  Either way, I think this was a GROSS mis-casting, if that’s even a word.

There was also something else I came across that caught my eye and made me wonder why it wasn’t heard about on a larger scale, but of course I can’t remember what it was.  In any case, what do think about Zoe Saldana playing Nina Simone?  If you’re a fan of the singer, do you still plan on seeing the film?  And what about Thandie playing Condoleezza?  If you saw the film, did she do a good job?  Or did you just focus on these two women being vastly different?  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!


Sometimes in life, we may regret a decision we made- going to the wrong school, buying a size 6 when we KNOW we should have gotten an 8, and yes, even dating the wrong person.  I would be lying if I said I didn’t have regrets- working during summer breaks at FAMU instead of interning for a law firm or politician, telling a certain guy “No”, telling a certain guy “Yes”, and yes, sometimes I regret telling Antonio not to contact me anymore.

Last night, I had an awesome conversation with TyAnthony.  I know that if I need somebody to bring me back down to earth, he can do it.  For the record, I did call Southern Cousin, but she didn’t answer her phone… Anywho, I relayed to TyAnthony that I think I made a mistake telling Antonio not to contact me anymore, and maybe, just maybe, I should reach out to him.  My logic was, a month has passed, feelings have simmered down, and maybe we could see where we stood.  I was willing to look over the fact that Antonio was not always a person of his word, that he would disappear for days at a time, and that he wasn’t an effective communicator.  (And by effective communicator I mean he would say one thing and do another.)  But in all of this, there were multiple signs all week that I encountered that confirmed I actually made the right choice, and I needed to stick with it.  The main thing was a friend on Facebook shared a status update that basically stated we, as women, have a tendency to get wrapped up/attracted to/care for men that don’t reciprocate those feelings.  And before we know it, we’re all involved with him and sacrificing ourselves when those feelings and actions are on a one way street.  So, to protect our hearts, we need to leave and allow the right man to come into our lives that will appreciate all that we have to give.  And that’s exactly what I did because I felt myself liking a guy that I felt wasn’t what I needed in my life.  Even after ALL of this, I still wanted to talk to him.

In my head, as I was calling Southern Cousin (twice) and Ty last night, my rationale was that if neither of them answered, that was a sign that I was supposed to call Antonio.  And wouldn’t you guess, Ty answered.  He definitely imparted some words of wisdom.  The first thing he said was only bad things can come from an idle mind.  And my mind was definitely idle last night.  It also is probably not helping that it’s colder than crap outside, and my social life is lacking right now… Ty also shared that Antonio may not want to talk to me after I told him not to contact me anymore, even if I was the one to make the call.  Basically, I need to just let this go and move on.

If you ever think you made the wrong decision, ask God to show you some signs.  But you have to be careful and ensure that the signs are coming from the right place.  If you’re not careful, you could make the wrong choice and have things end up worse than they already were.  My goal is to work on my social calendar and find some things to give me something (positive) to do.  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!

What’s New in Elle’s World

Happy Friday!  It’s been a week since I’ve posted.  Due to being sick and celebrating the Centennial Founders Day of my illustrious sisterhood, I’ve been busy! 

First, let me a send a huge special shout-out to the Devastating Divas of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Incorporated!!!  Sorors, I had a BLAST celebrating with you last weekend!  So much so, my cold came back, and I’ve spent this entire week trying to get better.  (I mean, I HAVE to see the POTUS get sworn in-again-on Monday!)  I am so honored, blessed, and humbled to be a part of this sisterhood!  This year is also special because I will be celebrating 10 years in Delta with my linesisters.  I’m excited to head back to Tallahassee this fall for Homecoming to hang out with some of my favorite people.  Most importantly, I have begun mending a friendship with one of my linesisters that is very special and dear to me.  It’s amazing what happens when you open up and are honest with those around you…and when you stop being scared.

Next up, “Scandal” has been AMAZING the last two weeks!  So much so, that based on last night’s episode, I’m going to start counting backwards from 5 (or 3 if my list is short) when I tell people off.  Edison and Sally are on some bs, and Fitz is not divorcing Mellie, even though he told her he wants one.  While I’m happy we see how the conglomerate was formed, I’m a little disappointed that they didn’t talk about how Hollis hired Becky to shoot Fitz…maybe that’ll come up later. And I’m really mad that we have to wait two weeks for a new episode…Shonda, that ain’t hot!  I did think Fitz was going to lose it at the podium, but I’m glad he held it together!  I was thinking to myself it’s about time for Mellie to have that baby, so I’m glad to see she goes into labor next week.

Tonight, I will be on the Daily Drum, with host Harold Fisher, discussing the show that never was-Shawty Lo and all his baby mamas.  No, I never blogged about this show, because I wasn’t interested.  I’m a reality tv fanatic, but some of these shows are getting out of hand.  And this was one of them.  So, tune it to WHUR 96.3 at 7 pm tonight!

Tomorrow, I’m super excited to participate in the Yes We Can: End Illiteracy service project with First Book – DC and other volunteers.  Providing the gift of literacy to these elementary school students in Ward 8 is going to be an amazing experience!  And I’m anxious to witness the swearing in of President Obama in person.  I wasn’t in DC during his first inauguration, so I’m making plans to attend in person on Monday.  Look for me in the crowd!

Lastly, if you’ve paid attention to your address line, you’ve noticed that I am official!  I purchased the domain www.evolvingelle.com.  So share the great news with your friends and family, and send them on over! 

Ok, folks!  Don’t work too hard today, be sure participate in a service event in your community tomorrow, and enjoy your long weekend!  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!

Happy 60th Birthday, Southern Dad!

No, my dad will not read this as he’s not much for the internet, but I can tell him about it.

What can I say about Southern Dad?  In a lot of ways, we are very much alike.  I even think I favor him more than Southern Mom. 

My dad jokingly calls me by one of his cousin’s names who remembers everyone’s birthday AND how old they are!  Each year I remind him just how old he’s getting.  But he also turns the table on me a time or two. 

Growing up, I couldn’t wait to see my dad; to me, going to Hilton Head or Jacksonville was a vacation.  I remember sitting on my daddy’s lap as a little girl, watching tv and rubbing his beard.  I’m fiercely protective of my parents, maybe because they were of me…and quietly still are.

My dad has challenged me in ways I never thought imaginable.  And even though I’m sure he has wanted to keep me as his “Little Boo Boo”, he has allowed me to grow up. 

So, to my daddy, retired educator, avid golfer, brother, and uncle, I wish you the happiest of birthdays this year.  You have touched so many lives, from your students, nieces and nephews, and especially mine!  Enjoy your day, and go play a round of golf!