I’m glad to know that my friends are just as excited about my birthday as I am.  I have a friend who’s coming in town from Chicago, and we were discussing the upcoming events of the weekend.  Our conversation led to discussion of proper club etiquette.  Yes, people, it does exist.  So as I prepare for my big birthday bash on Saturday night, gentlemen, please keep the below tidbits in mind.  (And yes, we know it’s mostly men who act all inappropriate when it comes to interacting with the opposite sex at the club.)

– DON’T grind up on a woman, especially if you don’t know her.  No stranger wants to feel your Mr. Happy on her hind parts…or any other part of her anatomy.

– DO introduce yourself.  Manners will get you far in life.

– DON’T paw a woman.  It’s ok to lightly touch her hips, but wandering hands will get you popped.

– DO offer a lady if a drink if you dance with her for more than one song.  (Remember what I said about manners???)

– DON’T try to have a full-fledged conversation in the club.  The music’s loud; you’ll be screaming at each other all night. 

– DO ask said lady for her number.  If you’ve danced to a few songs and you felt that you would like to get to know her outside of the club, ask for the digits. 

– DON’T go hopping from lady to lady in the same group.  Women travel in packs…well at least pairs.  So if Girl #1 isn’t interested, don’t get in her friend’s face.  You will get embarassed.  Walk around the venue.

– DO offer a lady a drink if you’ve danced with her for at least 2 consecutive songs.  I’m not saying it has to be an alcoholic drink; it can be a glass of water.  The fact that you offers shows you care.  I will say if you offer a spirited drink, it may help in your quest to get her number.

Well, that’s all I’ve got for now.  If you have any more club Do’s and Don’ts, feel free to share!  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city!