The Relationship Hiatus Talk

It’s everywhere-articles on how Black women will be forever single, how Black women should date outside of their race, how Black women need to cater to their man (if they ever get one), how to be more alluring to men, etc.  Well, I’m tired of all this relationship mumbo-jumbo. 

I have to admit, there have been times (especially in recent history) where I have discussed the non-existence of my love life and how I plan on changing that.  I have told you guys how I plan to go out more, how I plan to approach more men, how I plan to talk to men that are not traditionally “my type”, etc.  Well, no more.  I’ve come to the realization that I have tons more things to focus on than being in a relationship (I know, *gasp*!) . 

Meeting guys by going out more is not working for two main reasons: 1. I don’t feel like going out all the time and 2. The men in DC (or least the men in attendance where I am) are not the approach a woman type.

I’m not going to approach men because that’s really not my thing…at least while I’m sober (hey, just being honest).  I’ve gone out on one date with the last guy that I approached, and he sporadically texts me to see if I’m still alive (at least that’s what I’ve come up with).  If homeboy were really interested, despite his busy schedule, he would make time for me, at least a phone call or text on a regular basis.  I feel that if a man is TRULY interested in a woman, HE will pursue HER.  Call me old-fashioned, traditional, whatever…I’ll take it, because that’s who I am. (Hello, have you read the tagline???)  Pressing on…

And dating men that I are not “my type” has not boded well for me.  I’m just not interested, no matter how I try to make it work.  (Could it be a coincidence that both guys that fall into this category live in B-more??? Duly noted, don’t talk to any more guys that live in Baltimore.) 

I’m truly over the relationship thing.  I seem to have a penchant for tall, caramel complected brothers with a big build who are emotionally or physically unavailable.  And it’s only taken me 29 years to figure this out.  Just thinking about the last 2 guys that I have conversed with makes me question my sanity.  So, as far as I’m concerned, love sucks.  Yes, I know it works for others; some of my best friends are newlyweds, have babies, or about to get married.  I applaud them and am truly happy for them.  But where Elle is concerned, relationships can kick rocks.  And I don’t want or need you guys to try to talk me out of it or to change my opinion.  It is what it is.  At this particular moment on this particular day, my main focuses are getting fit and working.  If a man comes into my life, I know the Lord will give me a sign that he’s the one.  Until that happens, I’m not changing my mind.

Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city.

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