Long Distance Relationships

Happy Friday!!! It’s the final day in Relationship Week!  I was all set to write about “Fags and Their Hags”, but I just didn’t feel inspired to do that today.  Maybe I’ll save that topic for a future post.  In any event, I decided to write about long distance relationships.  I do know of two couples who have long distance relationship stories. 

First, let’s start with my friend, Marcus.  Marcus’ long distance relationship, or LDR, lasted a year.  Marcus feels that the biggest problem with this relationship was miscommunication.  Not everyone in the relationship shared his or her feelings about what was going in their personal lives, whether it was work, family, or socially related.  Conversation was not always open and honest.  Marcus and his girlfriend lived four hours away from each other and saw each other twice a month.   While they got along fine on the phone, there were some issues when they were face-to-face.  As they only had opportunities to interact 2-3 days at a time, if they had an issue that came up, it seemed really major because of how infrequently they were able to interact in person.  Marcus believes that with a long distance relationship you need trust and the finances to travel often.

Erin and I became friends during our sophomore year in college, and I was so happy when she married her long distance boyfriend, Jemiel, last fall.  They began dating in the Fall of 2004 and dated for 4 years before coming engaged.  While they have a happy ending, things weren’t always easy.  The couple didn’t share the same reality, as Erin lived in California and Jemiel lived in Connecticut, and the social activities on each coast were vastly different.  In order to make their relationship work, Erin and Jemiel inserted communication, transparency, and monthly visits into their relationship.   It also helped that the couple had a strong foundation, as they were friends were four years before they started dating.  Now, they are happy living together as husband and wife.

Just like all  relationships, long distance relationships can be tough.  Both parties have to trust each other, commit to have effective communication, and make efforts to see each other on a regular basis, which can be costly.  Do you think you could be in an LDR?  Have you been in one before; if so, what was the end result?  Please share your stories.  Until next time, I’m just a Southern girl…in the city.